Goodbye,”Sweet” Surgery #16.

Through it all, I’m very happy to say that made it out on top. Even through the fear and the worry, I came to find the sweetness from my support systems, my doctors, and ultimately in myself.


Yeah, last night I had a good cry, I’ll admit that.

Just about every other surgical procedure I’ve ever endeavored, has ultimately resulted in me having some sort of surgical complication, or another.  

If you’ve gotten to know me by now, this is no secret in any way.

So as I began to mentally prepare myself for what the following day might hold– while still staying as openly optimistic as possible–  I physically felt like I needed to prepare for the worst case scenario.

The worst cases being, of course, either me being readmitted to the hospital for more observation, OR even worse.. A potential extra surgical procedure.

This was my worry.  I knew that it was a cruel and intentional torture I had tasked upon myself. Still, almost superstitiously I felt like if I hadn’t physically prepared myself for the next day, I wouldn’t be able to tolerate whatever news my doctor had for me, on either a physical or even an emotional level.

I barely slept.

My anxiety was also partially attributed to the fact that I could barely handle the pain of riding in the car down the road, let alone an hour away to the hospital.  I was a mess.

Luckily, once we hit the expressway I was able to catch a few Z’s in the car; with a bag of ice basically glued to my wrapped up and bandaged arm.


We finally made it to my Dr’s office, and I am beyond pleased to share that all of my worry was completely for naught.

I met with my surgeon and he took off my bandages for the first time since the procedure.


To my surprise(s), not only were my stitches the dissolvable kind, but I was also–thankfully–fully healed.

He then gave me the full clearance to move on ahead!

  • Thus meaning the following: I could start bearing weight on my arm/prepare to start doing yoga again, get my arm wet/ shower, and eventually get the hell off my stupidly-addictive and only-moderately-necessary painkillers. (don’t even get me STARTED on how much I LOATHED my portable nerve block -_-).

So yes, I may still be in a lot of pain, but I know that with physical therapy, that this all should either slowly begin to dissipate or I’ll eventually return to my usual rate of chronic/phantom-limb pain, in time.

I do now have a new badass scar where he removed a third large neuroma, which was causing pain on the radial side of my arm. Yet thankfully, that is now the section of my arm with the least amount of total pain, so I am definitely going to consider that to be a big win, right there!

The hope is that the fancy new neurocaps that my surgeon placed on the ends of my revised nerves could potentially prevent me from needing any further neuroma revisions in the future.  Still, I’ll say it right here and right now. Although this surgery was meant to be an outpatient procedure, do not let yourself be fooled, nerve surgery is NO JOKE, painful af.

Anyway, for now only time will tell. I’ve still got quite a bit of work to do and a long road ahead of me. HOWEVER, for now I’m just really happy to hear that, with time, life can start to return back to “normal” ..well whatever that may even mean in my book, anyway.

Deep breaths. Strength and Ease.  I’ve got this in the bag.

#16, parting has never been sweeter!


How to put your hair up in a bun with one hand

Hey there! So, as promised, here is my YouTube remake of how to put your hair up in a bun! It’s short, sweet and to the point-so I hope you enjoy it!

My original video that I posted back in 2013 was pretty awful.. I filmed it on my laptop’s photo booth camera, whenever I moved I would shake the camera, and the cherry on top was that I got the hiccups in the middle of it all. It was a heated mess.  So, hopefully this one is at least a teeny tiny bit better, and I’ll just keep the old one locked away for ever because it was just THAT embarassing…

Anyway, I hope the sun starts coming out soon ❤ and happy mother’s day to all!!

Spring, Sprang, [unicorns], Spaceships, Sprung

This is no joke, I swear but Happy April Fools day though! I’ve only been fooled once so far today.. so hopefully it doesn’t get any worse than that! Anyway, here’s another vlog update!! I wanted to introduce you to someone new, but as you’ll see, it was very hard for her to want to stay still…

Enjoy your weekend! Hopefully these April showers won’t bring you down too much, love you fools ❤

An April Update

Just in time for the end of April, I’ve finally come around to give you an update!! 

So in the last month I’ve been keeping pretty busy, which is probably why you haven’t heard from me until now.
I saw my surgeon a few weeks ago and had my final post-op appointment with him! It came with both good news and bad news. The good news was that as far as surgeries go, I am done! There is nothing else to be done surgically, which would be good news, if only I wasn’t still in pain.
So, the bad news is that I can’t say that I am fully out of the woods just yet.
..But what else is new?
In order to manage my pain I am currently trying some different approaches, other than with surgery. I am seeing a pain management specialist and I’ve also restarted going to physical therapy in the hopes of trying to desensitize my arm. This helps to make it a lot less painful when putting pressure on it, which would help me to eventually get into a working and functional prosthetic.
Now before you jump the gun, I know that in the past I may have expressed some negative opinions towards prosthetics and wearing them. So although my view hasn’t really changed, I know that at the end of the day the point of wearing one would only help me to become more independent (than I already am).
As a side note, I have recently become enamored with watching Dancing With the Stars. (Yes it was total bullshit that Willow went home this week, we weren’t supposed to have to say ‘goodbye’ to Prim until November..)
However, Noah Galloway is the man.
If you have not seen him dance, I am pretty sure that you MUST be living under a rock.. but I’ll attach a video below just so you can see what I’m talking about.
Noah is an army veteran who became both an upper and lower extremity amputee while in service, but he has typically only worn his leg prosthetic before dancing on the show.
To make a long story short (you’ll see what happens in the YouTube clip), he too ended up having the same issues with wearing an upper extremity prosthetic as I’ve had. Basically, he felt that life was much easier when he worked the way he normally did–without a prosthetic. So it was kind of comforting to hear that.  But even after all of that, I am still excited to go through the process of being fitted again!
I mean, who doesn’t like getting new toys??
I will be heading back to Hanger Prosthetics in May, but this time I’ll be looking into getting my very first myoelectric prosthetic (one that would work very much like the one in the video).
There are a lot more exciting things to come in the month of May, so make sure to check back to see what I’m up to!
Also, if you want a chance to watch or vote for Noah Galloway (please DO NOT let him lose to the Bachelor, Chris Soles -_-) Dancing with the Stars airs LIVE Monday nights at 8 on abc.
As always, thank you for all of your support!! See you in May!

March Update

Well hello there! I hope everyone is as ready for Spring as much as I am! If you haven’t already heard, I just recently celebrated my 24th Birthday! HOORAY!!  …there really aren’t many milestones for when you turn 24, other than being a year away from turning a quarter of a century old. So, I guess that’s exciting? …anyway

So here are some updates with my health and healing and all that.
Over the past infinity amount of weeks I have been to and fro between home and my endless amount of doctor’s appointments, most of which were located an hour away in Philly. This month alone I think I’ve been up and back at the very least 10 times each way.

I’ve mostly had to go up to see my surgeon. My arm still wasn’t fully healed from the last surgery. So, I had been checking in with my surgeon at least once a week.
However, I saw his Physician’s Assistant last Wednesday and she was happy to say that I’m finally doing a lot better!
Now, a week later, my arm is all finally healed up! (What a great birthday present, right?) She also told me that I won’t be needing to see them again for another 4 weeks!

Also among my many numerous amounts of Philly doctor visits, I was able to see my Hematologist (blood disorder doctor) and my Rheumatologist (lupus doctor). Both of whom gave great reports so far, but we are still waiting for some blood test results to come in.

If you’re squeamish, skip to the next paragraph =D.
My two doctor’s ordered so many test results that I ended up having to give 12 vials worth of blood -_- I’d say about half of them were a little smaller than the rest.. but still. That was a doozy.

Anyway, outside of my medical life, I have finally been able to get myself up and out of my house for extended amounts of time without feeling too tired! It ended up working out so that I was able to actually go out on my birthday weekend and even enjoy a few beers at our local Beer and Music Festival!

So, what have I been doing during my many many weeks of recovery? Well, I became best friends with HGTV and I also got a lot of writing and organization done for the book I’ve been working on, too.

And I made this little treat for all of you!

Being in the hospital is absolutely NO fun. But if I start to get a little stir crazy when I’m there, I’ll try to make the best of it and entertain myself in whatever way I can. So, since I was in and out of the hospital so much, I began to document what that kind of boredom looks like. So I hope you like it! If not, at least way down the line somewhere I’ll have it to remind myself of what this past year and a half of my life has been like!


So here we meet again! I really just wanted you thank you guys for following my story and also to let you know that as tough as this 3 part saga may seem, beyond everything I really am still okay. I try my best not to wallow or sulk over anything that has happened or may happen in the future. This is my life now, this is who I am, and at this point I really have come to accept that. I’ve really never tried to fight or question what’s happened in any way either because hey, sh*t happens and that’s life. If there’s one life lesson that I could get across to you, that’d be it. Life goes on!
And right now, I know that all I need to focus on is approaching my life and goals head on and (if necessary) just from a different angle. That’s all.

Still, the truly greatest asset that I’ve had throughout this process has been that I have THE greatest support system behind me: my parents, brother, family and friends.
At the end of the day I know that this is all just temporary and I’m almost out of the woods and home-free.

ANYWAY with all of that off my chest, here’s

Continue reading “ACT 3 FINALE”

Revision Surgery (Act 2)

I’m going to be very honest with you, this bulk of the story is very important, but at times it is going to get pretty disgusting. I know you may probably think “well why the hell would I wanna read that?!”

Well…i dont really know.

Anyway, my main goals in writing all of this down and why I chose to share it with you is because of some of (but not limited to) the following different reasons:

1. To preserve my own memory of the chain of events

2. To share my story with others who may be going through the same kinda crap that I deal with on a daily basis and

3. Because I want you to know that as bad as everything I explain sounds, I am still doing my best and trying to get through it.

So its okay if you’re a little squeamish! Yes, you should probably get over that, but I’m still gonna do my best to look out for you.

So now that we’re clear, I just thought I’d give you a heads up to tread lightly as you proceed.. If you don’t think you can handle it, I’ve included the *look away* moments again, but if you can’t… well maybe we’ll catch up at my next entry or I’ll make another “how to” video for a break from all of this heaviness.

Anyway, here’s:

Act 2

Continue reading “Revision Surgery (Act 2)”

When the end of May felt like the end of the world…

I’ve noticed a trend here.
Every week, the very first thing that I say to you is how sorry I am that I haven’t written in a while.. Well this week’s long time no see is with good reason, believe me.
If anything I was kind of waiting to share the events of the past few weeks with you, until I got some good news to share, and now I do!

I will give fair warning though, a lot has happened in the past 2 weeks, and I I am willing to share what happened with you, I just don’t want to completely overwhelm you.

So, here’s what I’ve decided, I’m gonna tell this story to you in parts-Act 1, 2, (intermission & 3. Just so that I don’t completely bore you to death

Take a deep breath though because I promise its going to be okay!…
No need to worry, even if you are squeamish (it really isn’t all that bad) but I have edited out the gory details for you and I’ll even tell you when and where to skip ahead because I love you **just follow the stars**.
As for the rest of yooouuuu….jury duty, jury duty, blackmail, pink slip, eviction notice, jury duty!

Just kidding!! I had to lighten the mood =) Soo LEGGGOO


So, I actually had another surgery! (Surprise?) It was about 4 weeks ago now and yes it was planned and I’ve really been looking forward to having it done for a couple of months now. You may even remember way back when I first got my prosthetic I said that there was this painful clicking sensation in my arm/elbow that was just so uncomfortable that it completely prevented me from wearing my prosthetic arm at all. Anyway, if you don’t remember, now you know!

But this painful clicking felt somewhat like (what my dr’s said they thought it was, at first), a tendon over my bone… But it actually turned out NOT to be a tendon,but it was actually an enlarged bursa that really really needed to be drained! Do I know how or why it was there… Nope! But apparently it was pretty bad. Not only that, but there were a few other things going on in there too. Such as, a couple of nerve endings that were damaged (but fixed during the surgery), and they also did a debridement on my wound while they were in there as well (basically just cleaned out the dead/ inflamed tissue to prevent an infection from forming).
When the surgery was over, my doctor found my parents, and told them the details of how my surgery went, but I was just a little wonky coming out of anesthesia, so I really had no idea of what happened at all, just that nubbie (my amputated arm) was wrapped up like a really tightly wrapped boxing glove!

The procedure was performed at Pennsylvania Hospital in Philly and just like my last revision in December, it was done as an outpatient procedure. (Meaning that once the surgery was over, and the hospital staff thought that I was stable/well enough on my own, that I would be discharged right then and there, given a few extra bandages and gloves and sent “home”) The thing is though, that I don’t live anywhere near Philly. So just like we did in December, My mom and I stayed at a hotel in Society Hill which is only a few blocks down from the Hospital.

So far, everything that I’ve told you above this paragraph (obvi) are pretty much the most basic details that I can explain to you in the most plain way of saying it…. The rest? Well if you havent done so already, buckle up. No jokes, it’s gonna be a rough and bumpy ride.
Continue reading “When the end of May felt like the end of the world…”